Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Brains.

I don't usually read comics, since they're generally aimed at people with less brains than I have (and my brain is deader than the Twist). But I had to address Zombie Tales, from Boom! Studios/Atomeka.

Brains.

It's a collection of zombie-centric short stories, which is nice, I guess. But it's woefully unrepresentative of the average zombie's lifestyle, which, as I'm sure you well know by now, primarily involves the acquisition and consumption of human brains.

In fact, the only depiction of this essential zombie ritual occurs on page 29, and then only briefly, in one panel, with the resultant blood and gore rendered in lamentably tasteful and understated fashion. I mean, come on!! What is the point of portraying brain eating if you're not going to display in nauseating detail the nitty-gritty of the actual juicy, messy devouring of the brains? Sheesh!

I award this comic 11 brains. Which is the exact number of credited creators on the comic's cover, whose brains I will shortly acquire and consume. Mark Waid, Keith Giffen, Ron Lim: you have been warned! I am here to chew bubblegum and eat brains, and I'm all out of bubblegum!!

4 Comments:

Anonymous Nat said...

What is the point of portraying brain eating if you're not going to display in nauseating detail the nitty-gritty of the actual juicy, messy devouring of the brains? Sheesh!

Leaving the messy bodily stuffs out is the difference between erotica and pronography.

8:42 AM  
Blogger Archangel_Rokan said...

I disagree with "Nat". It seems to me that the messy body stuff is indeed nesicary. I mean what is a horror comic if not disgusting scenes of people getting eaten. And the thing on the cover doesen't even look like a freaken zombie, it looks more like a one armed alien.

PS Linked you to my site.

10:24 AM  
Blogger Archangel_Rokan said...

I also have a question. What is it you do with the bodies you get the brains out of? I assume you feed them to your new pet.

10:26 AM  
Blogger Zombie_Tom said...

Nat -- hey, now! Let's not cheapen a very beautiful and natural thing.

Archangel -- thanks for the link! But watch what you say about that cover girl, we used to date.

And I honestly don't know what happens to the bodies. I kind of go into a brain-eating trance; all I see is the brain. Sometimes when I come out of it, I'm miles away from where I last remembered being. Sometimes I have a new hat.

7:20 PM  

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